MARS FANFIC CHAPTER 9

CHAPTER 9

A week went by and nothing unpredictable happened in the Leto mansion. This was kind of weird. So one sunny Tuesday, the girls had to receive their reports from school. The girls were at their bedroom sleeping. Shannon opened the door and tried to wake them up.
Shannon: Giiirls, you have to wake up.
Muna: No, not now, I ain't feeling well...
Shannon: Come on sweethearts, it's important.
Anna: Just some more time please…
Shannon: You don't have time, Jared is downstairs. He just got your reports. You better go downstairs.
Anna stood up.
Anna: YOU'RE KIDDING!!! How the hell did he remember to get our reports?
Muna: REALLY! It's the first time! Uncle, please save us.
Muna got down on her knees.
Shannon: Girls, I don’t think there are many things you can do... except if you want to spend the rest of your lives in that room... locked up.
Muna: Anna, alright let's do this. Besides, he knows we pretty much suck.
Anna: Hmmm alright, let's go.
Shannon, Anna and Muna went downstairs. They found Jared in the kitchen looking at the reports again and again. Then he looked at them.
Muna: Hi...dad.
Anna: Yeah hello daddy, how are you?
Jared took a deep breath.
Jared: One thing, one simple thing. WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?
Shannon bit his lips.
Anna: I think they're called reports.
Jared: ANNA! Do you think I'm joking?
Anna: Your face does look funny.
Jared: Alright I won't even comment on the fact that neither of you have a grade in Algebra. Apparently the teacher gave up on you…
Muna to Anna: Is she the one who always wears that red skirt?
Anna whispered: Can't remember!
Jared: And also, since there is no grade better than D, I decided that I should ground you.
Muna: WHAT? What is this, some kind of a threat?
Jared: No, actually it’s a request.
Shannon: And how exactly are you gonna ground them?
Jared stood up and looked at the table in the living room. The girls’ drumsticks were there.
Jared: First of all, I am throwing away those drumsticks. You won't play drums for a month.
Jared grabbed the drumsticks.
Anna: NO no no no, dad, no not these drumsticks!
Shannon: Yeah dude what are you doing, I bought them those drumsticks!
Jared: I don't care.
Shannon: Holy crap, then throw away the guitars you bought them too!
Jared: What? Those are expensive, don't be ridiculous.
Shannon: The drumsticks are expensive too!
Jared looked at Shannon under his glasses. A second later Jared threw the drumsticks out of the window. Everyone watched while he did it.
Shannon: I can't believe you actual…
Shannon couldn't complete his sentence because a very loud noise came out of nowhere. It was a broken glass. Everyone looked out of the window.
Muna: Dad, I can't believe you broke Mrs. Marple's window with the drumsticks!
Anna: DAD, DO YOU REALISE WHAT YOU JUST DID?
Jared: Is she...the crazy one?
Shannon: Man yes, that's the crazy one who was chasing you all over the neighborhood the other day because she thought you were getting married, yes that's her!
Jared widened his eyes.
Jared: The blond one???
At that moment Mrs. Marple got out of her house and estimated the damage. Then she started screaming.
Mrs. Marple: WHO DID THIS???? Oh my God, my dear window...goddamn those suckers.
Jared whispered: HIDE!!
Everyone walked away from the window.
Jared started scratching his head.
Jared: We need a plan.
Shannon: What do you mean? Nothing can happen, Jared, chill out. If she comes here, we'll just tell her that we don't know anything.
Jared: Oh really?? And what about the drumsticks? As far as I know, Mr. Copperson doesn't play drums.
Anna: How do you know that?
Jared: Because he is 80 years old.
Anna: So? That doesn't prevent him from…
Jared: Anna, we need a serious excuse.
Mrs. Marple from outside: MUNA, ANNA!!!
Muna: Oops, she found the drumsticks.
Shannon: We need to RUN! The woman's insane!
Jared: Everyone get in my car now!
Everyone started running at Jared's house.
Anna: Shhh, watch your steps. Be quiet. She can hear...everything.
Jared: Sophie, what are you doing here??
Sophie was holding a bucket full of water.
Sophie: Hey, you asked me to wash your car, don't you remember? What happened, why are you all running like crazy?
Shannon: Can we explain some other time?
Mrs. Marple: OH THERE YOU ARE!
Mrs. Marple started heading towards them.
Shannon: GET IN THE CAR NOW, NOW!
Sophie: What about the bucket? It's full of water!
Muna: Just take it with you Sophie, we're dying!
Everyone got in the car and Jared started driving.
Anna, Muna and Sophie were sitting on the backseat. Sophie was in the middle.
Sophie: I still have the bucket with the water. This thing is heavy!
Shannon: Come on, give it to me, I'll throw the water out of the window.
Jared: Yeah do it now, cause in a minute we'll be out in the highway.
Shannon moved the bucket towards his window, however...
Muna: Uncle, the window is closed!
...and splash. Shannon and Jared got all wet.
Jared closed his eyes for a second.
Jared: I WILL KILL YOU!
Shannon: Shit, I'm more wet than you!
Jared: Yes, but I'm the one who's driving and if the cops stop us for checking, we'll be in trouble.
Muna: Dad, we're not shooting a movie right now, just drive!
Jared drove all the way downtown, without really knowing where to go.
Anna: Where are we going?
Sophie: Let's go to Tomo's!
Muna & Anna: YEAH!!!
Shannon: Uninvited? Well...we don't really have anywhere else to go in this condition.
Jared: Guys!
Shannon: Yeah Jared, I know it ain't very polite but look at this mess.
Jared: Uh no guys, the cops are behind us. They just nodded me to stop. I TOLD YOU THAT WOULD HAPPEN! FUCK FUCK FUCK.
Jared started hitting the wheel.
Shannon: Hey relax, shhh. We'll sort it out. Oh shut up, he's coming.
The policeman asked Jared to lower his window.
Jared smiled.
Jared: Hello officer.
The policeman just looked at him. The girls exchanged scared looks.
Policeman: You look familiar, have I seen you before?
Sophie: He is Jared Leto, the front man of 30 seconds to Mars and he is also an...
Jared turned back to Sophie.
Jared: Sophie, SHUT UP. (He then turned to the policeman again) She is right. You may have seen me on a movie or something...
The policeman got even more serious.
Policeman: So I guess you can explain to me why you and the man next to you are all wet.
Shannon: Actually I'm his brother, the drummer of...
Jared looked at Shannon.
Jared: Shannon, this is NOT the right time.
Shannon: Well officer, I think it's a pretty big story, if you have time we can let you know. Nothing illegal though.
Anna: Breaking windows isn't illegal?
Policeman looked at Anna.
Policeman: What did you say, little girl?
Jared sighed.
Anna: Nothing important, you know I'm a little girl...words come and go.
Anna put on an awkward smile.
Policeman: And mister...Leto how come you and your brother are in a car with 3 under aged girls?
Jared: They are my daughters.
Policeman: And why am I supposed to believe that?
Jared: Look mate, I've been very polite. There's nothing wrong in here, alright? It's me, my brother and my daughters. And we are wet because my brother threw us the water which was in this bucket. Yes that one at the backseat. Now we need to go, we're kind of busy.
The policeman got all furious.
Policeman: I need your license.
Jared looked for his license.
Jared: Where the fuck...Shannon where is my license?
Shannon: I don't know. Have you been using my car lately?
Jared: OH FUCK...Uh my license is at home, officer.
Policeman: Mister Leto, I think you are kidding me. I will force you to come with me, including your brother and girls.
Jared: WHAT? Take me home and I will show you my license! And the girls’ birth certificates, if that's what you want.
Policeman: Not a bad idea. But all that will happen at the department. Please follow our car.
And the policeman got back in his car.
Jared: Right, now I'll get into jail because of these goddamn drumsticks.
Muna: Don't worry dad, it's a nice motive to get into jail. It's not like you killed someone.
Shannon started laughing.
Jared: Do you think this is funny? I'm going to jail.
Shannon: WET!
Shannon continued laughing.
Jared: This is not my family, there must be something wrong.
Jared, Shannon and the girls followed the police vehicle all the way to the police station.
The policeman led the Leto family to the sheriff. The policeman opened the sheriff’s office door.
Policeman: Mister Leto, explain the situation to the sheriff. I'll come in in a few minutes.
They entered the office. When the sheriff saw Jared and Shannon, his face shined.
Sheriff: OH MY GOD! THIRTY SECONDS TO MARS IN MY OFFICE!
Jared looked at Shannon.
Jared: Uhm yeah, hey…I'm Jared Leto.
Shannon: And I am...
Sheriff: Of course, you are Shannon Leto and you've got your awesome guitarist Tomo, right? The man knows how to rock those tunes.
Sophie: Oh sheriff, you're an echelon!
Sheriff: The ultimate echelon, see... I have this little kitchen here to make coffee every day. Follow me.
Everyone followed the sheriff. He opened another door which led to a small room. This room was full of 30 seconds to Mars posters.
Sheriff: See I got all your CDs, some posters here and I buy Kerrang and NME every month to catch up with you guys. Been to 4 shows of yours, you are amazing. My daughter loves you as well.
Jared and Shannon had completely freaked out. The girls were enjoying the whole situation.
Sheriff: So what brings you here? A crazy fan?
The sheriff winked at Jared.
Jared: No, actually an officer found out I had forgotten my license at home, so he brought us here and all...
Sheriff: Oh you're free to go of course, damn, no need to check further.
Shannon: So we're off to go?
Sheriff: Yeah sure, but would you mind to do me some little favors?
Jared: Sure, sheriff.
The sheriff smiled.
Sheriff: Well, first I'd like you to sign me your autographs here on my desk. And, also, would you mind singing 'Closer to the edge' to me? It's my favorite song! All together!
Shannon whispered at Jared: You know that this isn't happening, right?
Shannon: Uhmm...sure...girls?
Girls: SURE!!
So everyone started singing 'No I'm not SAYYYYYYYING, I'm sorry, ONE DAYYYY MAYBE WE'LL MEET AGAINNNN'.
Suddenly the door opened and Mrs. Marple appeared.
Mrs. Marple: SHERIFF I NEED TO…Oh here you are! I've been looking for you everywhere Jared and Shannon. Oh, Sheriff you are too fast, didn't even submit to arrest them...yet.
Sophie: WHAT?
Sheriff: Arrest them for what? Oh, Mrs. Marple this is the 3rd time in a week that you come to my department with no reason. And you just interrupted the most important moment of my life. THEY ARE 30 SECONDS TO MARS!
Mrs. Marple: I know very well who they are. But after I turned down Jared, because you know sheriff he was too persistent and I just can't stand this type of men, I realized that I have to treat them like actual people. Because maybe that's our fault after all. Today those little dirty girls threw their drumsticks at my window and it broke! There is something we can do about it, right? Maybe a potential engagement with Jared could fix the whole pain I went under.
Jared: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? ARE YOU INSANE?
Shannon: Asking that is like asking if Tomo will cut his beard, dude.
Mrs. Marple: Jared, admit it! Admit to the world that you think about me day and night, that I am your only desire. Maybe you can send those girls...somewhere you know, in Europe! It would be ideal. And we could start all over, oh Jared and then I will forget about the broken window!
Mrs. Marple tried to touch Jared. Jared jumped on the desk.
Jared: Sheriff, arrest me! If it is the only way to get away from her, arrest me!!
Sheriff: Mrs. Marple, please, don't make things harder.
Mrs. Marple: Jared, get down! We need to write our vows, remember?
At that moment the girls grabbed Mrs. Marple’s hair.
Muna: Bitch, if you ever dare to touch our daddy again, you're dead. Got it?
Mrs. Marple: Ouuuuuuch, Jared, your girls are hurting me.
Jared singing on the desk: YEAH I'M A SELFISH BASTARD, BUT AT LEAST I'M NOT ALONE...
Sheriff singing along: ...MY INTENTIONS NEVER CHANGE..!
The girls took Mrs. Marple out of the police department while poor Shannon was trying to get Jared off the desk.
Shannon: Dude, we need to go now, nice party, woohoo, enjoyed it, but it's over.
Jared: WAS IT A DREEEEEEEAM, WAS IT A DREAAAAAAM…
Sheriff: IS THIS THE ONLY EVIDENCE THAT PROVES ITTTTT…
Shannon started shouting: You probably want me to bring all the policemen of the department to crowd surf?
Jared: WOW! Wouldn't be a bad idea! You know, I'm thinking, maybe we could do 'Search & Destroy' in a police station, you can get arrested and maybe Tomo comes and helps you escape and then...
Sheriff: Can I be the sheriff?
Jared: Sure, I’d be pleased!